Category: Writers Block
Hey guys it's electricity! I know electricity doesn't write stories but, this one does, hahahahaha! read it, like it, love it, I don't care! Sorry if the line breaks aren't where they are supposed to be, I did this the best I could. Please don't feel afended if I afended anyone here
1. The True GirlFriend
It's some day of the week. Kev is bored out of his mind.
Kev: God it's so boring.
The phone rings.
Phone: ring, ring
Kev's mom: Kev? It's Ben!
Kev: Ok thanks got it.
Kev: Hello?
Ben: Sup?
Kev: Na much, what you duin?
Ben: Nuhthin, just bored.
Kev: hahaha yeah me to.
After a while or sumthin....
Ben: I just met this gummybear16 chick.
Kev: Cool. When?
Ben: Couple uh days ago.
Kev: Oh.
They talk for a while.
A couple weeks pass and Ben calls again.
Ben: Hey Kev.
Kev: Hey.
Ben: Hey wanna come over some time this week?
Kev: shur.
Ben: How bout tomorrow night?
Kev. Shur!
Ben: Cool
After a while Kev has to go.
Kev: dude I gotta go.
Ben: k, see ya tomorrow then.
Kev: yep see ya.
It's the next day. Actually the day after the day Kev was going to go over Ben's house.
Ben: So your mom's cummin at 1 right?
Kev: Yeah.
Kev goes on the zone.
Kev: Ben? is gummybear16 the person you were tawkin about a while ago?
Ben: Yep.
Kev looks at her pf.
Kev: awesome, it shows her msn and aim, I'm gonna add her.
Ben: I've got ur on aim.
Kev. Oh. Kev adds her to aim.
Kev: she's on! cool!
Kev: IM her and tell her that one of your friends is going to IM her so she doesn't get confused
Ben: Ok.
Ben IM's her.
Ben: she said it's ok.
Kev. Sweet!
Kev types, Hey.
Gummybear16 types, Hi.
It's quiet now.
Kev. The heck? Where'd she go.
a little while later...
Ben: she said she was havin a problem with her computer, she said to IM her again.
Kev. K.
Kev IM's her and they talk for a bit.
Kev. It's almost one.
Ben: Yeah you better pack up.
Kev drives home with his mom. It's silent the whole way home. Kev's thinking about gummybear16.
Kev thought: Hope I get to talk to her later.
Kev talks on vt with niko, her, and someone else for a while.
Gummybear16: darling!
no reply.
Kev thought: She's wierd.
Well, if I remember right it's a few days later on freedom chat.
Kev joins a random channel.
Kev sees GB!
Kev thought: whoa! it's gb!
GB types: it happened.
Kev types: huh?
Kev remembers that a lot of people know GB and they said she had a bf, darnet!
GB types, I broke up with Daniel.
Kev types: (privately) Oh, I'm sorry.
GB types: privately It's ok.
GB types: cries.
Kev thinks: GB is really crying? Oh my... I wish I could do something for her.
Kev, after getting to know GB a little, decides, wow, I duhno why, but I think I like her.
Kev types: I think I love someone.
GB types: Who do you love?
Kev is blushing heavily.
Kev types: I luv u, but doesn't send it
Kev tabs over to her name.
Kev. Um...
Kev. Here goes nuhthin!
Kev presses enter!
Kev's heart is racing.
Kev's heart: pound pound pound pound pound
Damet! I don't remember what happens after that! Something about she says she can't go out with anyone yet. She's gotta get over Daniel.
A couple days later.
Kev talking to Daniel on skype
Kev: so you guys broke up I heard?
Daniel: yes, for a good reason.
Kev: how come?
Daniel: wehlhlhlhlhlhlhlhlhlhl,
crap! this is not going well at all! Thought I'd remember more than this.
I think a few days later, I'm writing an e-mail to Karrie, as I found out what her name was.
Kev thought: I like that name.
Kev asks her out.
Kev thought: I duhno how this is gonna work cuz she's all the way in Winsconsin but let's try it!
Karrie writes: I'll give you an answer on your birthday ok?
Karrie knows when Kev's birthday is cuz I believe I told her.
Karrie later writes: I'm gonna be gone for another week.
Kev is really gonna miss her. Kev is gonna cry. Actually he does.
Kev: I'm going to bed, I can't take this.
Kev dozes off for a while. Then he's awakened by something.
Kev looks up. He sees the stars! Karrie's image comes to his head.
looking at the stars, Kev thinks, wow, karrie sounds so, sweet, she's so cute.Kev eventually falls back asleep. He has many dreams of Karrie for a while.
The week slowly passes by.
Kev accidently gets rid of JAWS at school.
Kev: o man? I'll make an authorization disk since the dam crack doesn't work and I wanna put jaws 5 on my laptop at school and we have JAWS 3.3.
It's May 6! Kev's birthday! He thinks about Karrie almost every second of the day!
In Kev's English class, while he's reading the five people you meet in Heaven pages they were assigned, Kev makes the JAWS authorization disk.
It takes a couple minutes to make the disk since it's gotta copy sector by sector.
Kev thought: Good thing she told us to read. This kills time.
Kev fake reads.
The class has a quiz afterword. They knew about this quiz before they started reading, since this was the purpose of reading those 12 or 13 pages. Kev doesn't do too hot on the quiz but oh well...
Kev takes the quiz on his Braille Lite.
On his laptop later...
The authorization works!
Kev. Yay, well, it's my birthday, everything better work.
It's finally the end of the day!
Man my hands are hurtin already. Anyway...
Kev. Cant wait to see Karrie!
Kev is silent the whole way home, stairing out the Window looking at all the cars going by. He wonders what his answer from Karrie will be.
Kev is home!
He races to his computer.
Kev frowns.
Kev. She's not on fc, she's not on the zone, where is she?
It's 5 o'clock.
It's six o'clock.
The AIM door opens!
Guess who it is? It's Karrie!
Kev! Oh my god, yes!
Kev types: Karrie!
Karrie calls him later, I don't remember what Karrie says, but who cares. This next part is more important. muhahahahahahahaah!
On the phone
Karrie: Hi.
Kev: Hi.
Karie: do you want an answer?
Kev: ur... yes...
It's quiet for a while.
Karrie, softly: Yes.
Kev: I'm, I'm blushing. Oh my gosh are you, are you shur?
Karrie: Yeah, I am.
They fake kiss on the phone.
Karrie: I love you!
Kev: I love you too!
They hang up after a while.
Another slow week passes by.
Kev lies to Karrie about some stuff.
They break up for like 5 minutes, then Karrie asks him out again.
A couple weeks later, Mel finds out.
Mel seems mad.Mel doesn't want Kev to know but Karrie tells him. Mel likes him too!
When Karrie's away at school, Kev, well, kinda since there broke up now, talks to mel a tun.
Kev is really pist at Karrie.
Kev types one day: If you wanna be my girlfriend, you can't be depressed all the time.
Kev regrets he ever did that.
Eventually, they go out again.
Kev. this is so cool.
Karrie: I nevre wanna leave you!
Kev: I never wanna leave you either!
And the relationship is still going on! Yay! We might get to meet this summer, thanks to Ben for tellin me about her. Karrie I love you more than anything I have ever seen, dreamed of, or even thought of, please stay with me for eturnity.
And that's how it is right now, no joke!
2. We Finally Meet!
It's July 31, the day we're goin to the Dells!
Dad: Everyone set?
Kev: Yeah, I'm so excited!
Mom: Yep all set
Dad: Yep.
in the car for a while.
Well I dont know what's gonna happen on this day. We'll probably hang out for a while or something.
It's August 1.
Kev: We're goin to Noas Arc today right?
Ally: Duh, hahahahaha!
Kev: this is gonna be so fun.
Ally: I haven't been to Noas Arc forever!
Kev: I know and maybe, I hope...
Ally: you hope what
Kev: Nevremind.
Ally: Tell me!
Dad stops us.
We're at Noas Arc.
Dad: Dude, check out this waterslide!
Kev. Wanna go on it with me dad?
Dad: Shur Kev.
Whoa I'm actually blushing in real life now as I write this. Anyway this is probably not exactly how this is gonna happen but...
I hear some people tawkin.
The're right next to us.
An adult girl: haven't been here in a while.
Dad: Us either.
A younger girl: Where you guys from?
Kev: Illinois.
there's a light pause.
The younger girl: Oh we're from Winsconsin.
Kev: O cool.
Kev to the younger girl: What's your name?
The younger girl: Karrie.
Kev. O I'm Kevin but most people call me Kev.
Karrie: Huh? You?
Kev: What?
Kev and Karrie: I know you!
Ally: uh?
Kev gives Karrie a big hug.
Karrie: Thanks
Kev. Yep hey, wanna, um, go on that waterslide ahead?
Karrie: Shur!
Dad: Hey! Thought you wanted to go on it with me pal.
Kev: Next one ok man?
Ddad: K.
We get up to the water slide.
Mom: You guys shur you'll be ok?
Kev: Yeah! I'll be fine!
Karrie: Yeah.
Kev and Karrie get on to the slide.
Dad yelling as he leaves to go on a different ride with mom and ally, have fun you too!
Karrie and Kev: thanks dad
Kev: Um, he's not you're dad?
Dad: hahahaha
Dad and mom and ally: See ya!
Kev and Karrie are getting ready to go down the slide.
Kev: ready?
Karrie: I'm afraid but...
Kev: 'cmon it'll be ok.
Karrie takes a deep breath.
Karrie: baby?
He blushes
Kev: Ready?
Karie: yeah! on 3.
Kev: one? two? three!
Kev grabs onto Karrie's hand and their flying!
Kev and Karrie: w'w'w'w'w''w'w'w'w'w'wo!
Kev: Wow! This is exactly how the story I wrote went! Yeah!
Karie! I know baby!
Kev screams as hard as he can: Karrie I love you!
Karrie and Kev laugh really hard!
Karrie: : screams, I!love!you!too!
No! the rides almost over!
Kev: it's gonna end soon!
Kev and Karrie: ahh!ahh! w'ww''w'w'w'w'w'wo!
Splash!
Kev: That was fun!
Karrie goes under but comes up after a while.
She is gasping for air.
Kev: You ok?
Karrie: ya. ya. yeah. i'm fuh... fuh... fine
Kev: I...
Karrie: You what...
Kev grabs onto Karrie'S sholders.
and then?
a flash of light!
Kev kisses Karrie!
Karrie: awww your so sweet!
Kev: no you are baby.
Just then...
Dad: Kev! other way man! other way!
Kev: It's my dad!
Dad: This way, this way, there ya go.
Kev holding Karie's hand helps her toward the sound of dad.
Dad: huh ho Kev is that a girl you got there?
Kev: Yeah! remembre the...
Dad: Shit! are you serious?
Kev and Karrie: we're going out!
Mom and Dad: Wonderful!
Dad: wow! must uh asked her out when you were on the water slide huh pal?
Kev: no.
Karrie: a couple uh weeks ago, well yeh.
Kev: we love each other so much!
Karrie: Dam right!
Kev and Karrie hug.
Ally: What the!Kev I saw you kissing someone earlier?
Dad: Aw 'cmon Ally, he's got a girlfriend here.
Ally: What?
Kev and Karrie: Yep?
Kev and Karrie are laughing so hard!
Ally: hmm.
It's the next day.
We found out which hotel Karrie is staying at and she comes to shop with us!
Karrie whispers to her mom: Where are the rings?
Her mom finds them
Karrie whispers: I'm lookin for a mood ring, that's what he wants.
Her mom finds one.
Karrie thought: this is gonna be perfect!
Later just before we get in the car goin back to our hotels, Karrie says something
Karrie: Kev sweety I got something for ya.
Kev: oo! what is it!
Karrie: Here.
She opens and up and hands it to Kev.
Kev: Whoa it's colorful, it's...
Kev puts it on, the color changes!
Kev: Oh my god Karrie thank you! Thank you!
Karrie kisses Kev.
Karrie: Your welcome.
Oh I failed to mension, me and her were waitin for our parents to come out uh the store. hahahahaha!
Karrie: I love you so much baby!
Kev: I love you more that I've met you princess. I wish I could have bought something for you.
Karrie: You don't have to. You're presents is good enough.
Karrie and Kev hug each other for a long time. People are walking by butKev and Karrie don't give a dam.
Suddenly they hear footsteps cummin towards 'em.
They split apart.
Dad: Right kiddies, we're off again.
Mom walks out of the store I can hear her and Karie's mom tawkin.
Mom: Karrie's gonna stay with us for 3 days is that ok Kev?
Karrie gasps.
Kev: What do you mean is that ok! You no it is!
Karrie and Kev: you're the best!
Later we get home, Karrie and Kev swim in kev's pool.
Kev: God what a nice day out.
Karrie: Yeah.
Karrie: I'm tired, wonder what time it is?
Kev: me too, wanna go inside?
Karrie: shur.
Kev leads Karrie inside.
Dad: Where you guys gonna sleep tonight?
Kev: how bout in the living room?
Kev: We can sleep on the couch cuz I hate sleepin on the floor.
Karrie: good idea.
Dad: ok.
Kev: We'll be back
Kev: Karrie wanna go check out my room?
Karrie: Shur!
Kev: ok.
Karrie and Kev are now in his room.
Karrie is walking around his room.
Karrie:Nice room!
Kev: thanks.
After a while, it's close to midnight, Kev and Karrie are sitting on Kev's bed.
Kev is looking out the Window.
Kev gasps
Karrie: What's wrong?
Kev whispers since everyones asleep: Nothings, uh, wrong?
Kev reaches out for Karrie's hand and she grabs it.
Kev then grabs on to Karrie's other hand.
Kev: stand up and look that way.
Karrie: Why?
Kev: because I want you to look at something special.
Karrie: OMG! are the...
Kev: yep?
Karrie fake screams
Kev and Karrie kiss
And now, it's silent Kev is humming here without you.
Karrie: could u sing it?
Kev sings the whole song.
Karrie: awwwwww thank u!
Kev and Karrie then lay down in each others arms
The air is a nice gentle cool breeze.
Kev and Karrie whisper: I love you.
The night fades to complete blackness, and Kev and Karrie fall asleep.
ok see what I mean? theier not in right places, sry
baby... it's beautiful... thats all i can say
I'd say there is too much conversation and not enough emphasis on the vital physical reaction to what is being said...and it could do with more drama, to off set the sweetness but otherwise, its a really good effort...smile
Kev, good luck and have fun.
cheers
PS dont be too wordy, when you write a story.
yeh i no that was, a little wordy i guess
Drink Draino. It will make you a better writer. All the cool kids are doing it.
Drink Draino. It will make you a better writer. All the cool kids are doing it.
good idea, not?
o and blindguy, u have two of the same posts, um? yeah.
this topic should just die and things just like another topic i posted back when i was kev5688, yeh